01: Introducing New View Advice with Amanda Durocher

In this first episode of New View Advice, Amanda introduces herself and the podcast. You’ll learn why Amanda started New View Advice and how it’s different from other advice columns, her goals for the podcast, topics you can expect moving forward, and how to submit questions for future episodes.

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By the end of this episode you’ll learn:

  • Why Amanda decided to start New View Advice

  • How New View Advice is different from other advice columns

  • Goals for the podcast

  • Topics you can expect to hear moving forward

  • How to submit questions to future episodes

Episode References:

Timestamps:

  • 0:00 Intro

  • 1:06 Why did I start this podcast?

  • 11:25 What kind of topics can you expect to hear?

  • 13:09 How can you submit a question?

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  • This podcast was transcribed by an AI tool called Otter. Please forgive any typos or errors.

    Amanda Durocher 0:00

    Hey, before we get started, I just wanted to give you a heads up that this podcast discusses heavy topics as well as uses explicit language listener discretion is advised. Welcome to New View Advice, a safe place for you to ask your most vulnerable questions about life, relationships, healing, and so much more. I'm your host, Amanda Rocher, and I believe our fears and traumas are often what holds us back from living life to the fullest. Join me here each week as I offer advice on how to move through whatever is holding you back from being your best self. Let's get started. Hello, and welcome to the very first episode of New View Advice. I'm your host, Amanda Durocher. And I am so excited to be here. And I am so excited to have you joining me for today's episode, it's going to be a little bit different than future episodes, because today the questions I'm going to answer are about myself. So moving forward, the questions will be all your questions. But today I wanted to answer why I'm starting this podcast my goals for this podcast and how you can submit questions moving forward.

    Amanda Durocher 1:06

    Okay, number one, why did I decide to start this podcast, I decided to start this podcast because I feel like I was seeing a hole in the advice columns and the advice podcasts that I was finding, I thought that a lot of these podcasts they focused on your current situation and external solutions, where this podcast is going to be me offering you tools and tips for how to access your inner world, I believe that you're the only person who has the answers. My goal for this podcast is to offer you healing centered advice. So what this is, is I want to connect you to your inner world and doing the inner work, which means to me asking yourself about your inner world, and staying present with the memories and the feelings that arise. So many people are running away from how they feel at all times, and never take the time to sit with it. So so many people are numbing, or keep themselves overworked, over busy to avoid sitting with how they truly feel. So an example I have of like your inner world. And how I think a lot of people live is say your inner world is a rug. And in a perfect world, the rug would be flat. But we get these emotions, which are like cookies, and we shove these cookies under the rug. So you're showing your feelings under the rug, you're shoving the feelings down in your body. And the more cookies you shove under the rug, the bigger this mound becomes and the more less manageable it is. You try to put furniture around it and you try to clean around it. But there's always this mound, and you try to like hide it, but it's always there. And eventually it becomes too big to ignore. And my guess if you're listening to this podcast, you have a mound of cookies under your rug that you can no longer ignore. You can no longer ignore how anxious you feel, you can no longer ignore how unhappy you are, you can no longer ignore how every time you look outside yourself, it does not bring you any more happiness. Well, if that's you, this is the podcast for you. Because I am going to help you cultivate happiness, self love self acceptance. By diving deep into your world. I believe that real healing happens when we find the root cause of our pain and suffering. And the pattern that is popping up over and over again in our lives. And also when we feel our feelings are so important. And they're not for the faint of heart. It takes a lot of courage to really look at your fears, trauma feelings, and I want to help you do that. And I want to help offer you tools. So it's not so daunting. I think a lot of us believe that. If we actually leaned into the pain, we feel that it would overwhelm us. I also think so many of us because I meet these people all the time, have numbed themselves that they don't even have, they don't feel like they have access to those feelings. But I have so many tools that if you don't feel like you know how to cry or yell or get in touch with those, I want to help you get in touch with your feelings because I just want to tell you right now that if you feel like you don't have feelings, that's just not true. We're living in a world right now that it is impossible not to have feelings. It is impossible not to feel outraged about anything. It is impossible not to fear anything with the amount of fear thrown in our faces every day. I mean, right now we're in the middle of a pandemic. That's very fear inducing. We're going through a collective trauma. We have feelings, we have feelings about it and you might be good at naming it and shoving it down but I can tell you right now you have them. I am going to be fully honest with you and I don't really enjoy talking about myself. But I am here and I am excited to be here with you and I want to share a bit about myself so that you feel safe asking questions to me and so that you can know a little bit about my background. I started of my healing journey in my 20s, my early 20s With the death of a really close friend, when he died, it was the moment I went off autopilot for so long I was living how others told me to live. I went to the college that others told me to go to I graduated, I got a job. I was in a long term relationship. But I went through the motions that everybody said, if you do this, you'll be happy. But after my friend died, I re examined my life. And I was like, I am wildly unhappy, I am depressed, I am anxious, I hate everything I'm doing. So what now, what I realized was that the only person who was going to be able to bring me happiness was myself. And to do that, I had to start looking at why I was so unhappy, and why the things I was doing, weren't making me happy. So the healing process is an absolute roller coaster, I really thought that once I healed the grief, I felt when my friend died, that I would be happy. And the truth is, it was just the beginning of my journey. Throughout my grieving process, I also had to reconcile with disassociating from my childhood. So what I mean by that is that I was physically there, obviously, but I was mentally checked out. This is a very common trauma response, I don't think it gets enough attention. I think a lot of people don't really remember their childhoods, and this is from disassociation. And for me, my childhood was pretty traumatic. I was raped by a friend's father. And then I didn't have the emotional support system to deal with it, which caused just repeated trauma throughout my childhood. It wasn't until I was about 27, when I saw a new therapist that I realized I was living with PTSD. And I had no idea. So for me, a big part of my healing journey was feeling the loss of the childhood I didn't get to have after I was raped, I went through life trying to keep myself safe. So I know how deeply trauma fears and childhood experiences affected who I am today. And I believe this is true for so many of us. So many of us are walking around living out patterns that we picked up in our childhoods. So I want to help you through this advice column get to the root causes of why your present day reality is the way it is. So if you're having trouble in relationships, I want to get you to the root cause of that. If you're healing from rape, I want to help you with that. If you're grieving, I want to help you with that. If the grief you're still experiencing is from 10 years ago, five years ago, 20 years ago, I want to help you with that, it stays until we fully heal it, we just start to bury it back to the cookie example. You shoved it under the rug. And it's in there, though, and you're just walking around the mound and you're wondering why you're so afraid to leave your house, or you're wondering why you drink too much at night, or you're wondering why you don't like to call your mother. These questions you have about your present, all go back to your root causes. I want you to feel like you can take control of your life because I know for a long time I felt fucking helpless. There was no one out there who was telling me that it was all going to be okay. There are people who tried to minimize what I went through. There are people who repeatedly asked to be why wasn't over it yet is because it wasn't healed yet. But I felt like society was shaming me for how long it took me to heal. And I want to be here for you to tell you that I'm with you every step of the way. I'm starting this podcast because I am passionate about doing the inner work and how that process will allow you to heal will allow you to thrive and will allow you to be your best self. I want to offer you full disclosure here and I'm not I don't have a degree in this. I'm not a therapist. I'm not a doctor. I'm not a life coach, but I'm an expert. I'm an expert of my inner world and I want to help you become an expert at Drs. I recently read. Melodie Beatties book codependent no more and she discusses how at the beginning she says she's an expert. She never considered herself an expert at codependency. And it's absolutely hysterical because she's probably the top expert in codependency. But I loved reading that because how she views herself as a woman who healed from codependency who learned about codependency and continues to heal from codependency. That's how I feel. I am a woman who continues to heal and wants to help others heal. I feel like I did so much of my healing journey alone. And I spent nights on Google not finding the right answers. And I don't want you to go through that. I want you to ask me your questions I want to cheer you on. I want to create a community of people who can come together and bring shame to the light and a no judgment zone. So as someone who has read hundreds of self help books, see multiple therapists use different healing modalities, different techniques, body techniques, hypnosis, you name it, I've done it. The one consistency with my relationship with myself and cultivating self love. I am so passionate about getting you in touch with you. So I am here to help you fall deeply madly in love with yourself. Another motivation for me to start this podcast was that the healing process can be very expensive. And I want this to be a free resource for everyone. I hope that this podcast can be a resource and a tool for you along your healing journey. I believe that along our healing journeys, we're going to use a bunch of different modalities, we're gonna listen to a bunch of different people, a bunch of different teachers, we're gonna read a lot of different books, I even believe that we're gonna have different therapists, I know for myself, I've gone through many therapists, and I think a lot of people can relate to that. So I want this to be a resource for you. It's not the end all be all, and you may not be able to relate to every single episode. But I'm going to include tools and tips throughout them that hopefully can be universally applied to many different situations. Because I find that even though all our stories are different, and all our experiences are different, the feelings we have are universal. So the pain, the suffering, the panic, the terror, the horror, the sadness, the grief, those are all universal feelings that come up throughout all these different experiences we all have. Another reason I decided to start this podcast is that trauma can be very isolating. And we often feel like many people don't understand what we're going through. But I believe that the core emotions felt are much more universal than we tend to believe, even if the details of what we suffer from are different.

    Amanda Durocher 11:24

    Okay, so what kind of topics can you expect to hear on this podcast? I really want this podcast to be driven by your questions, your experiences, what you're going through. So really, the topics are going to be open ended. I say any topics on the table? I want to debunk shame. I want to debunk your fears. I want you to live your best life, I want you to know how fucking fantastic you are. And I promise that if I don't have the answers, or if I don't have advice for a certain topic that I will get experts and guests who are knowledgeable on those topics. I want this to be a space where you can ask all your questions. Obviously, I won't be able to answer every listener question, but I'm going to look for the main themes and answer as many questions as possible. What are my goals for this podcast? So my number one goal for this podcast is to create a safe space for you to ask your most vulnerable questions. I want to be that person that you can ask anything to, I want you to know you're never judged. And I will always keep your questions anonymous. I want this to be a space where you can ask those questions. You don't feel comfortable asking your friends, your family, even your therapist, tell me what's going on. And let's talk about it. Because shame grows, where there's secrecy. And for us to heal, we need to bring all those secrets, all those feelings, all that stuff we stuffed down and we feel too ashamed to tell people, you have to bring it to the surface. So I want this to be a resource for you along your healing journey. I also as I mentioned earlier found that the healing journey can be very expensive. So I want this to be a free resource for you. And each episode I will answer questions as well as offer a free resource are very cheap resource because sometimes it might be a book, but something that I recommend for that week's topic.

    Amanda Durocher 13:00

    So the final question for today is how can you submit questions? I am so excited to read all your questions, and I have a few different ways for you to submit them. First, you can submit questions by emailing me at newviewadvice@gmail.com. So the second way you can submit questions is on my website at www.newviewadvice.com under the Submit a Question tab. And here you can submit a question, either audio recording, which is kind of cool, and you could hear your voice on the podcast, or you can submit a written question. The third way to ask a question would be through Instagram or Tiktok. You could send me a direct message both at New View advice. Yes, I'm on Tik Tok, I can't say I'm very good at it. Honestly, the app makes me feel very old. But it's fun. And I hope that I can put some of these easy techniques I have on there for you. So you can send me a direct message on both those apps. I will say that this is the least anonymous way to send it because I would have access to your profile. But I'm happy to take questions that way and I promise to keep you anonymous on the podcast, and I will leave a link to all those in the show notes below. Thank you so much for joining me for this very first episode of newView advice. I am so excited to be on this journey of transformation with you. I truly believe that healing happens quicker when we do it together. So I am hoping that each episode will bring you a new perspective as well as comfort that you're not alone in any feeling you have to view the complete show notes and all the links and resources mentioned in today's episode you can visit newviewadvice.com Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast so you can receive new episodes right when they're released every Monday. Also, if you enjoyed this inaugural episode, I'd love to ask you to rate this podcast and leave a review. Every review helps to bring more listeners to this podcast and helps me to continue bringing you content each week. Your review really does make a difference. Thank you again for joining me Amanda Durocher for this episode of New View Advice I'm so grateful to be here with you and to offer you a new view on whatever you may be going through See you next time

    Transcribed by https://otter.ai


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