40: Cheating: Being the Other Woman & Should I Tell His Girlfriend He Cheated (With Me)

In this episode, I answer a question from someone wondering, “why am I ok with being the other woman?” And I offer advice to someone who recently found out that they were “the other woman” and is debating whether or not to tell his girlfriend that he cheated on them.

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Journal Prompts:

Free Resources 📑

Other Episodes on Cheating:

Timestamps:

  • 0:00 Intro

  • 3:20 Listener Question 1

  • 23:04 Listener Question 2

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    Amanda Durocher 0:00

    Welcome to New View Advice, a safe place for you to ask your most vulnerable questions about life, relationships, healing, and so much more. I'm your host, Amanda Durocher, and I believe our fears and traumas are often what holds us back from living life to the fullest. Join me here each week as I offer advice on how to move through whatever is holding you back from being your best self. Let's get started. Hi, there beautiful souls. My name is Amanda. And this is new view advice. If you're new here, this is a healing centered advice podcast where I offer advice for the healing journey. I do not believe I have all the answers you seek. I believe you have all the answers you seek, you just may need a little guidance along the way. Thank you for joining me for today's episode. Today we will be talking about cheating, and specifically from the third person perspective or that quote unquote other woman or that quote unquote other person, and how cheating and the dynamic of cheating affects this person. I've done multiple episodes on cheating for anyone who hasn't listened to the podcast before. So you can look back at the feed and see if there's any other episodes that resonate for you on this topic. But today I wanted to talk about this perspective, because I haven't discussed it in detail yet because I was waiting for questions. So I'm excited to dive into cheating from this other person perspective, and hopefully offer some guidance to two listeners who had questions. One is from someone who finds themselves in the other woman role often and has been cheated on in the past. And they don't understand why they keep finding themselves as the other person if they know how painful it is to be cheated on. The second question is from a listener who recently found out that they were the quote unquote other person in a relationship, and they find themselves wondering if they should tell the other person in the relationship about their partner's cheating. So as I mentioned, I've done other episodes on cheating. So if you're new here, there's Episode 22, Episode 29, Episode 30, Episode 31, and episode 32. I'll cover different aspects of cheating because as I talked about a lot, I think this is a very complicated experience to go through. I think that it's not as simple as someone cheated their bad. I think that it's a complex situation. I think humans are complex. There are many different reasons people cheat. There are many different reasons people find themselves being the other woman or the other person in a relationship. And I just mentioned that in case anybody's new here and want some more resources for this topic. You can also check out my website, new view advice.com. And there you can find also some journal prompts for cheating as well. And I also want to mention that I did two episodes in September, an episode about relationship resentment, and an episode about should I get back together with my ex. And I think those can be helpful for people who are moving through the cheating wound as well. I know that should I get back together with my ex, there was someone who had experienced cheating in that episode as well. So I just wanted to mention that there are lots of resources here for you to listen to and learn from. I have covered a lot in those episodes. So today, I'm just going to jump into answering the questions. So let's jump on in.

    Amanda Durocher (listener question) 3:24

    I have been cheated on a few times by the same man, but also in multiple relationships. I know the devastation, the feeling of rejection, the wounds that just fester and don't heal. But if I, myself and the other woman or other person roll a lot, why do I put myself in these situations knowing exactly what it feels like to be cheated on? Thank you for this question. This is a great question. And I just want to say that it sounds like you're really self aware, becoming self aware. Meaning that you are seeing a pattern you are playing out here, you often find yourself as the other woman or other person. And that is a pattern because you keep finding yourself here. And it's also a pattern you want to change. So I just want to honor that. I think self awareness is the first step with so much healing. And it's important to become aware of what we do and why. Because we can only start to make changes in our life when we bring things from the unconscious to the conscious. So I really feel like self awareness is such a big key along the healing journey. I think so many of us live on autopilot for a really long time. Meaning that we're just going about our lives unconscious. We're not really aware of why we're doing things. We feel like a victim on the world. We feel like things go wrong, and we don't understand why. But it's really when we start to become self aware and see the patterns and start asking ourselves questions. So it's a big part of self awareness is starting to ask ourselves questions which we're going to discuss here. I'm going to offer you some questions you can start asking yourself to dive deeper into this. Because as I mentioned, self awareness is a key to the healing. So it's really becoming aware of why we do the things we do and ask ourselves questions about why we're repeating patterns. Why we do behaviors we may not be happy with, or what motivates us to do the behaviors we do like it's really becoming aware of who you are and why you do the things you do. So I just wanted to honor that. I feel like you're really becoming self aware by really noticing this pattern. And it sounds like you want to change because I don't think you'd be writing into this podcast if you didn't want to change this pattern you've been playing out. Now, as always, I don't know why you keep putting yourself in this situation. But I'll offer you some prompts to dig deeper, I'll offer you some different perspectives. But this is a question really only you will know the answer to because I think that many people could find themselves in the same situation. And they would have a different reason for why they put themselves in the situation of the other woman or the other person. And it's a complicated question, as is cheating. As I mentioned, it's complicated. And it's just not simple. So as I mentioned, everybody's going to have a different answer. So I want to help you figure out your why get connected to why you're playing this out. And then you can decide from there if it's a pattern, you want to keep playing out, but you're probably continuing to play it out because it's unconscious why you do this. So as always take what resonates and leave what doesn't, it's my intention to guide you and to offer you some advice. But really, this is your journey. So take what resonates and leave what doesn't. So my first piece of advice would be for you to start journaling. My question is do you already journal Do you journal occasionally. And if you don't journal already, I would say that journaling will help you to get in touch with yourself. Because it sounds like to me like you're looking to dive deeper into why you do the things you do and possibly alleviate yourself of some of the hard feelings you may be feeling these feelings could be guilt, you may feel guilty that you play out this pattern. You may feel ashamed, you play out this pattern. You may feel angry, you play out this pattern, but you want to start connecting with those feelings and what they're trying to communicate to you. So as I mentioned, I think in last week's episode, our feelings are information. So I think that you're probably feeling feelings about your actions. So you have feelings about the past, where you were cheated on multiple times by the same man and in different relationships. And you probably have feelings about being the other person finding yourself in this situation, and feelings, our information, feelings are not trying to punish us even though feelings can be really difficult to feel, especially the hard ones. They're not trying to punish us. It's a way our body is trying to communicate the Now moment it's trying to communicate our inner world to us. So it's communicating it through feelings in the body. And us as a collective often numb out these feelings ignore these feelings shove these feelings down. But it's important to allow these feelings up because they're really just trying to communicate how we can move forward, how we can grow, and how we can move towards the version of ourselves, we dream up the version of ourselves, we aspire to be the one who's aligned, really, that's all we want to do is come back into alignment. So we can live in peace, joy, and love and all those juicy, wonderful feelings. But you have to honor all the experiences you've had here, you have to take the time to be with your own heart. So a great way to do this is through journaling. So here are some journal prompts you can start with but you may prefer to just sit down and free write about your experience or free write about your feelings. Asking your feelings questions. So if you feel guilty, saying Dear guilt, why do I feel guilty, communicate with those feelings and allow yourself to free right? This may feel awkward at first, but I promise it's a practice. And when it feels awkward, it's oftentimes our ego is defensive. It doesn't want us to dive deeper. It's trying to keep us safe. But allowing your ego and your body and your mind to see that it is safe for you to communicate with yourself will really help you in this self awareness and this healing journey. And by doing these things regularly, we create safety. So a lot of people want one time journaling to uncover everything one therapy session. And it's a practice all these things are a practice because you're building safety within yourself in order to dive deeper. So as humans, we build up all these defenses around us. And all these defense mechanisms and examples of these could be numbing disassociating deflection. So if somebody calls you out on something, you immediately deflect back. It could be anger could be yelling, it could be self shame. criticizing yourself self critical behaviors is a defense mechanism. It's trying to keep you safe and keep you from doing things that seems scary or from being too vulnerable. Vulnerability is such a key to a happy life, but vulnerability has been weaponized against us here on Earth. That's how I believe when I look out in the world. And people absolutely rip apart vulnerability. They're very critical of people who are vulnerable. It can be very scary because when we were children were often taught not to be vulnerable and to fit in with the norm and being vulnerable is being your authentic self. It's being who you are, which is individual from everyone else. It's different, you're gonna have different thoughts and opinions, you may overlap with someone, but your inherent life experience is different. Your point of view is different, it's unique, your gifts you bring to the world are different, they're unique or special. And that is really terrifying for us. So we build up all these defenses. And I just mentioned that because I think people can really resist journaling and meditating which are two of the foundations to the healing journey. In my mind, I think that meditation and journaling developing these practices are so helpful because they can't be taken from you. In the world we live in, there are two things you can always do. So we just lived through a pandemic. And we can talk about the effects of that on another episode. But two things you can always have are meditation and journaling, no one can take those from you. As long as you can find a pen and paper, you can journal, you can journal a napkin, you can use your computer, your phone, but those are two things that you always can have in your back pocket to assist you on the healing journey. So that's why I think they're so essential to build those practices. And to build that relationship with yourself. It's also really important to get out all the thoughts in our head on paper, it helps us to see what we have in our head in a new way. And that can be really helpful for us because it can seem so daunting. All the thoughts we have, when we put on paper, it can just feel like we're releasing that from ourselves. When we replay thoughts over and over, it stays there, it moves the energy. So I just wanted to mention that that I think journaling could really, really help you connect back to yourself, because journaling is very therapeutic for the mind and body. And it helps to alleviate some of the chaos that's going on in our heads. So here are a few journal prompts that I came up with that I think could help you connect to your question, because as I mentioned, I'm not going to have the answer to this. But I think there is an answer. I think there is a Why do you do this? I'm 100% sure there's a route to this, but I don't know what it is. So some questions I recommend starting with would be what beliefs do you have around relationships? For example, do you believe you will always get hurt? Or do you believe that people are untrustworthy? Or do you believe that someone will always leave you? Or do you believe that you have to change yourself in order to be loved? Explore the beliefs you have about relationships? What is your relationship with trusting people? What is your relationship with trusting yourself? Allow yourself to explore these into explore your relationship with trust? What feelings arise? When you think of yourself as the quote unquote, other woman? Do you feel happy, sad, guilty? Allow yourself to explore the feelings that arise? Then, after you do that, I would ask you if these feelings remind you of any times in your childhood, for example, if you always feel guilty, I would ask you to explore When did you first feel guilty? Or what memory of guilt comes to mind as you journal about this guilt in the present? Is there a past experience that is arising as well? Are you seeing images? Or when you ask yourself? Is there anything else that arises that reminds you of this feeling? And then I would ask you, have you released that guilt? Or does it still live in your body? Where can you feel this guilt in your body? Can you talk to this guilt or whatever emotion it is, and explore it deeper? And if a childhood memory doesn't arise or a memory from 510 years ago, or even a year ago, a month ago? I would have you skip that part and go straight to where do you feel the guilt in your body communicating with that part of your body becoming aware of when that part of your body is activated? That may seem like a lot, but I wanted to give you an example of how you ask a question and you continue to go deeper. So I'm going to put all these on my website at newView advice.com/forty. And you will be able to see these journal prompts if you found any of these helpful for you. And this leads into my second piece of advice because with this last journal prompt I mentioned connecting to your childhood. And my second piece of advice would be to begin doing some inner child work. So you may choose to do this through journaling. You can also do it through meditation. And you can also explore different inner child practices but inner child work is going to help you here I believe, because many times when we were playing out unconscious patterns and beliefs. One way we can see the root of why this pattern is repeating is by connecting with our inner child. So inner child work is connecting with a part of your subconscious that is unhealed from childhood. This part of your subconscious has created beliefs about the world based off of situations and emotions experienced in childhood. So connecting with our inner child allows us to see these subconscious beliefs and heal them and I believe inner child work is important here because so many of us create our basis for relationships in childhood and until Talking about like the first 18 years of your life, it could also really have been developed in your teens. I'm currently doing a lot of inner teen work. And I can see how much my teen years affected me and the beliefs I built about the world, the beliefs I built about relationships with people. So when I say inner child, it could be your going back to age four, or it could be age 18 1617, it really is any age. And as you continue to do inner child work, you'll begin to meet yourself at different ages, because you developed beliefs at different ages. So in my healing circle, we've started to do inner child work. And people have mentioned how they thought it was interesting that if they do the same inner child meditation multiple times, they'll meet different aspects of themselves, they'll meet themselves at different ages. That's why I often like to say we have inner children, because I've found throughout the healing journey, you end up meeting yourself at every age, you know, and it's so beautiful, because you're getting to know yourself deeper. Because so many times in these younger ages, we were living life unconsciously. So we get to repeat ourselves, and we get to offer ourselves compassion. By meeting ourselves in this way. Inner Child work is also helpful because as adults, we tend to punish ourselves or criticize ourselves for our actions. When we begin to connect with this inner child aspect of ourself, this self at different ages, we view the inner child often outside of ourselves. So I'll give a few examples of what you can do. But you view the child outside of yourself, which helps you to see that when you developed this belief, you were, for example, age five, and seeing yourself as a five year old, it is much easier for us as humans to offer ourselves compassion, like, Oh, my God, I was so small. Oh my god, of course, that's what I thought I needed to be safe. Oh, my God. Of course, that's how I felt when my parents did X, Y and Z course that child deserved safety deserved a love. Of course, that child misinterpreted that situation, it's a lot easier for us to be compassionate with ourselves. I believe on the healing journey, we want to develop compassion for ourselves at every age. But many of us don't know how to be compassionate with ourselves. We don't live in a world that's overly compassionate yet, my hope is that that changes over time. But because of that, we can be extremely critical of ourselves and punish ourselves. And as I mentioned, this can also be a defense mechanism. So we want to start communicating with our inner child to build that compassion with ourselves. But also to connect with the root beliefs of why we do the actions we do. Many times our inner children hold the keys to why we keep playing out patterns. And it's not until that experience that root experience, or that original experience where that belief was developed, is acknowledged Are we able to heal and move forward and allow ourselves to move past it by seeing the experience honoring the experience, feeling all the feelings attached to the experience and forgiving ourselves and we are able to release that pattern, you can do inner child work in multiple ways, I recommend either journaling to your inner child, and I have a resource on my website, where it walks you through the steps of journaling back and forth with your inner child. And I also have a meditation on my website, and on my YouTube channel, that's an inner child meditation that will help you to meet and connect with your inner child. So those are two great ways to begin connecting with your inner child. So if you choose to journal with your inner child, a few more questions you could dive into would be exploring your relationship with your parents or your caregivers. What was this relationship? Like? Was it stable? Are they still together? What is your relationship like with your mother? What is your relationship like with your father, allowing yourself to explore these fundamental relationships from your childhood can often help you see why you created the beliefs that you continue to play out now? So for you, you're asking, Why do you lay out this role of the other woman when you know how painful it can be, I think for you is going to be really helpful to dive into what are your beliefs around relationships. So as I mentioned, that's a great journal prompt or doing this inner child work. But that is going to help you see why you continue to play out these different patterns, either finding yourself in relationships where you're cheated on, so with people who may not be trustworthy, and also playing the other woman, is there a part of you that enjoys that? Or is it that you're always surprised you're the other woman, but exploring where that began? When was the first time you were cheated on, go back to that explore that that may not be your inner child, but it's your inner young adult who may have experienced and taken on beliefs the first time they were cheated on? So my last piece of advice would be for you to find ways to be more compassionate with yourself. From your question. It sounds to me like you're extremely hard on yourself for your actions. But the truth is, much of what you are currently playing out is subconscious because you don't know why you do this and it will be easier for you to begin to uncover Why you do the things you do if you can be kind to yourself and bring more awareness to your actions, many of us are very critical of ourselves as I mentioned, which just makes the healing journey harder. It just makes it harder because we often keep ourselves from uncovering truths by criticizing ourselves or it just takes so much longer to get there. Because we're beating ourselves up. I'm seeing it as you're trying to get from one goalpost to another goalpost. And there's one person who's just able to walk to the goalpost. And they get there quicker than the person who's being beat up by themselves, who's hitting themselves knocking themselves down, kicking themselves tripping themselves, and that compassion will help you to stop beating yourself up for things that you're learning and becoming aware of my guess is that the criticism probably hits you later. So you end up with a guy who's already in a relationship, and then you may be berate, or criticize yourself later. So you don't know why you do it. But my guess is your unconscious while you do it, that's just a guess I'm not entirely sure. But I invite you to get in tune with this and to become more conscious of your actions when you are doing these actions. I truly believe that the best way for you to figure out why you put yourself in these situations is to prioritize getting to know yourself, can you spend some time single, I think many people want to rush through being single and want to jump into relationships. But allowing yourself to be single can help you to be intentional and undistracted as you are healing. Sometimes relationships are exactly what we need. And other times they are a way for us to distract ourselves from sitting with ourselves. Being in a relationship with another person is a great way to distract yourself. Also, creating drama in relationships is a great way to distract yourself. I don't think we talked about that enough. The drama we create in our relationships, our friendships, our family life, is just another distraction from who we really are from getting to know ourselves better and from sitting with ourselves, because so many of us have so much pain that we have to sit with. And we need to acknowledge, and we deserve to acknowledge that pain. But it can be really scary to acknowledge that pain, and relationships can be a great way to distract ourselves. So I invite you to explore if maybe taking some time away from relationships could be healthy and healing for you. Before I wrap up this question, I just want to say you deserve love, you deserve your love and kindness, and you deserve a happy and healthy loving relationship. You truly do not need to settle for less, you are worthy of true love and worthy of loving all of you and someone who will love all of you. But this will start with you loving you first. It's really true that the more you love yourself, the more the outside world will begin to reflect back to this love. I promise it is safe to explore this deeper and to fall in love with yourself. You are magnificent. You just need to remember that I'm sending you so much love. Thank you for this question.

    Amanda Durocher (listener question) 23:09

    Recently, I started seeing someone we met at a bar and we had an immediate connection. We spent the weekend together. And since then we've been seeing each other for a few months, he asked me to be his girlfriend, and I really thought we were in love. Recently, I found out that he's in a long term relationship with someone else making me the other woman. I'm devastated and shocked. I never thought I would find myself in this situation. I never wanted to be the other woman. I don't know if I should tell his girlfriend or just let it be any advice on whether I should tell his girlfriend or not? Thank you for this question. I am so sorry to hear that you find yourself in this situation. And that you're experiencing this, this is really painful. I just want to take a minute to honor that I am really sorry that you're moving through this shock and devastation are really hard emotions to feel and they can be really abrupt on the body. So I just invite you to be gentle with yourself as you're moving through this time. So in order for you to make this decision, you want to become really clear and intentional on why you are making the decision you make. So you want to be really clear on why you are reaching out to his girlfriend, or why you choose not to reach out to his girlfriend. Because by being clear and intentional, you'll be able to accept your decision. Because right now it sounds like you're bouncing back and forth between should I should I not should I should I not. And that's going to use a lot of headspace. So you want to become clear. And this doesn't mean it's going to happen overnight. But you want to take time to become clear and intentional about why you're making the decision you're making and to ask your heart what decision your heart wants to make. It can feel hard to become clear on what's best for us. The answers also don't always come as quickly as we'd like when we're sitting with our hearts when we're asking ourselves what decision is best for us. But one One way you can become clear on your intention for why you would tell his girlfriend or not, would be to look at the decision from the lens of are you making the decision out of love or out of fear. And I've talked about this on the podcast before. And what I mean by this is that if you're making a decision out of love, you're making it from a loving place. So that could look like my heart is asking me to tell this woman about the situation. And I know that that is what my heart believes the right thing to do is, or it could be, I am choosing not to tell his girlfriend because I am choosing to lovingly disengage entirely from this person and everything associated with him, I know that my heart needs to create a boundary, and I need to let everything go associated with this person, a decision out of fear could be I want to tell his girlfriend to get back at him. And that's not a loving place to be coming from. It could also be I want to tell his girlfriend, because I'm not the only one who should be feeling pain. That's a fearful response. Because you are fearing that if you're the only one feeling this pain, then you're the only one quote unquote suffering, or if the answer is to get back at the person, and that's coming from a controlling place, which is fearful. So you just want to become clear on why you want to either tell the girlfriend or not, I think that sometimes we have to feel a lot of feelings first. So you don't have to rush this decision. So you may have to feel your anger or your devastation first, in order to know what's best for you to make sure it's coming from a loving place. Because the truth is, you can't control how this woman is going to react to this information. So you have to be seeing it from a place where you aren't expecting anything from her, where you're not expecting anything from what she says you're telling her because it's something you've chosen to do. Because you're clear on your why you decided to share this information. I will say that I think that also when in doubt, telling the truth is often a good way to go. But for you it may not be the case. But I've been thinking about this in my own life recently. Sometimes it can seem easier or even nicer to not tell the truth or to omit the truth or to sugarcoat things. But that doesn't necessarily make it what our heart wants to do, which is what is always best for us. We often think that by not saying the truth or by not saying the whole truth, that we're being kind and that we were thinking of someone else's feelings. So in this situation, you might think that if you don't tell her, you're sparing her of the pain you're feeling now, but to me, that would be a fearful response. Because in that situation, to me, I think you're actually thinking of yourself. And you and many of us are the ones who don't want to be uncomfortable with someone else's reaction, or we're so used to people pleasing in all areas of our life that we end up not being truly honest, when honestly is often what is best for the situation. Another example of this truthful conversation, and where sometimes we may omit the truth. But the truth may be better is for example, when there's someone with really bad behavior, and nobody wants to call this person out for it. And we think we're being kind by not calling this person out for their bad behavior. But actually, this person may never know how their bad behavior is affecting people. If no one ever tells them, we're actually taking away their opportunity for growth, as well as stunting our own truth and our own growth. So for example, if there's someone who always snaps at everybody, and everybody just ignores it, and everybody just lets it go under the rug, but it's hurtful every time this person may think that people just easily forgive them for the snapping and it's not affecting anybody, but it is hurting people and other people need to voice back and reflect back to this person that their actions are harmful. And that can help them to maybe see themselves in a new light. So you may decide to tell the truth and tell this other woman about what her boyfriend had been doing behind her back so that she had been cheating with you. Or you may decide that as I mentioned that your heart just wants to fully disconnect from this person and wants zero contact with him and who he is seeing and that really is okay, too. You just have to decide what is best for you and become clear on your decision. As I mentioned with the lovers fear, you can ask yourself questions like What would you like if the situation was reversed? Or are you telling his girlfriend to get back at him? Or is it because you feel it's the right thing to do? Do you have any expectations from telling his girlfriend because the truth is you can't control others will respond as I mentioned, so you have to be okay with the person may be responding poorly. But you're saying it because you're not intending anything in return. You are just telling it because that is your truth. And what you have decided is best for your own heart and your own journey. Because you may need to tell this girlfriend so you can fully move past it and let this go so that you're no longer playing this situation back and forth in your head. You have to figure out what's best for you. So I think journaling and using those questions I just mentioned could be really helpful or meditating but giving yourself time will help you to become clear on this situation. As I mentioned, there's no rush, I think oftentimes, we think we need to rush a decision like this. But as I mentioned, allow yourself to feel the feelings first and then see what you want to do allow yourself to be clear and intentional about this decision. Because you also don't want to do it from a really triggered place where you tell her and then maybe she responds poorly. And then it sends you down a rabbit hole, and you end up taking on some of those feelings or that hurt, you don't want to create more pain for yourself. So it doesn't mean don't ever tell this woman, it just may mean you need a little bit more time to be a little more stable and a little less in that devastation and shock, as you mentioned. And I also just want to mention that I am so sorry, this happened. I am so sorry. You're feeling shocked and devastated. And I want to offer you some grace and compassion. I'm not sure if you're holding on to some shame and guilt, which may be motivating you to say something, but I invite you to let yourself off the hook. I think you even calling yourself the other woman, if you're using that in a negative way could be harmful for you, because you didn't know what you didn't know, you didn't know you were the other woman. And I just want you to offer yourself some grace and compassion because I'm really sorry that you found out that you were being cheated on behind yourself. That's not easy. You deserve love and compassion through this time, too. You didn't know what you didn't know. And you were blindsided here too. So let yourself off the hook for the blame. It sounds like you may be holding on to you are not responsible for this. You chose to trust someone, it's not your fault that he has proven to be untrustworthy. And I just want to send you so much love as you're moving through this. I know it's not easy. It is a very challenging time. And I just invite you to be kind and patient with yourself. Give yourself that self care, be kind to yourself and create some practices to help you move this energy which is through journaling, meditating, exercise, whatever it is, that helps you to feel better, give yourself more than that than you usually do. And I am sending you so much love you're so worthy of love, and especially your own hearts love, so be kind to yourself sending you so much love.

    Amanda Durocher (outro) 32:14

    Thank you for tuning in to another episode of New View Advice. As always, I am so grateful to be able to have these conversations with you each week. And I hope that even if you don't find yourself in the other person's situation that you were able to find something helpful in this episode, and able to find something that will assist you on your own healing journey. If you haven't already, I invite you to leave a rating and review for the podcast reading reviews are really helpful to help bring more people to the podcast, and to help people to know that this is a safe place for them to ask their most vulnerable questions. So if you have an iPhone, unfortunately, I think it is only through Apple right now that you can leave reviews. But if you have an iPhone or you have Apple iTunes on your computer, you can go to the new view advice episode page, scroll to the bottom and leave a five star rating and a review. That would be so helpful and I would be so grateful it's a great way to support the podcast. And if you're unsure of what to leave in the review, you can leave the title of your favorite episode, because that would be super helpful for me to know as well. Thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of New View Advice. As always, I hope I was able to offer you a new view on whatever you may be going through. sending you all my love. See you next time

    Transcribed by https://otter.ai


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